Thursday, 15 November 2012
Most family relationships are complicated, jealousy, resentment, abandonment, embarrassing dad dances, to name just a few. I think at least one or more of these can be found bubbling under the surface of even the most stable of family units.My family seems to be dealing with all of them and then some. Years of drama's, traumas, fights and upheavals have taken its toll.
I often wonder what will happen to the relationship of all four siblings as we grow older. Will we drift apart and never see each, like My Mothers family and my Fathers. Would we remain as close as we are now. Our lives have already began to go their own separate ways. My oldest Brother is married with 3 children and lives far away from the rest of the family. My Sister, will be married come January. That leaves me and my Brother Karl.
Karl, is only a couple of years older than I am, he is successful for his age and is probably the most reasonable, rational and all together stable member of our family. There was a division in our family from as long as I can remember, My Mother raised Karl and I and my Father raised my oldest Brother and my Sister. As Karl and I grew up, we were best friends.
Which was lucky because the three of us moved around a lot. The two of us would often get up to mischief, something which you just don't see now a days. Both of us would often skip school and wander about town, as early as being about 6 years old. As I said, things were different back then. I have nieces now and they are dropped off and picked up from school.
As we got older, there was a period where the 2 year age difference, might as well of been a hundred. It was around the time he started going clubbing at about 17 and I was too young to go and to even understand that scene. It wasn't until I got to around 19-20 that we became close again. It helps that he is gay as well, as now we can and do go clubbing together, talk about relationships and enjoy the same kind of satirical humor and banter.
We have always maintained our own relationships, had separate groups of friends but spending time together happened often. He was the reason I initially moved to Manchester and is often the biggest factor on me wanting to come back to Dublin. He spent a year in Australia and I missed him terribly.
Yesterday, we drove to Navan in Ireland, Karl had some business to attend to and I joined for the ride, which was just over an hour each way. On the drive back towards Dublin, we talked about old times, the things we got up, the problems we encountered, which inspired me to write this post. I am lucky to have a fantastic group of friends both here and in Dublin but I am even luckier to have a brother like Karl. If I was to lose all my friends tomorrow, I will always have him.
Sometimes, when family issues, get to much, there is nothing more I love to do, than jump in his car, go for a drive, talk things out, make a joke out of it, lightening up whatever situation has arisen. It makes things easier to deal with. He has even performed CPR on me, I mean come on, bringing me back from the dead. I literally owe him my life.
I probably don't tell him enough, but I love him dearly.